Of course you do, I wanna TELL you something awesome.
OMG don’t we just neeeeeeeed hastag underscore bells and whistles and a motherfucking parade something awesome right now sitting here completely fucking SHATTERED after the death of Prince (I wrote like nine billion blog posts and none of them can even hold a candle to what his music meant to me, it has been the soundtrack of my WORLD) and then DAMN, I am dumbstruck after watching Beyonce’s Lemonade so HEY GUYS HERE IS SOME GOOD NEWS.
Boo slept last night without the light on. BAM.
Manchild has needed a TV, laptop/computer/ipad screen AND a fucking lamp shining in his room since he was BORN, lighting up the whole damn street with its iridescence. I reckon half our electricity bill is his nocturnal lighting requirements, the other half is his incessant need for a damn fan in his face.
But this morning when I went into his room – knocking first because HELLO TEENAGE BOY – it was almost dark. Just the light of his ipad and TV blinking.
NO MOTHERFUCKING LAMP!
(Lets ignore the fact, for the moment that he is sleeping in the spare room and not his own as he FINALLY chose a new bed after years and years of sleeping on a death trap aka a kids loft bed not made for a 6ft million soon to be man and now refuses to sleep on said new bed that he fucking chose because it is ‘too low’ Jesus wept tears of complete exasperation while riding that bike I keep banging on about, dude has some super rad glutes.)
HUZZAH! WE HAVE PROGRESS!
I tried to not make a fuss about it. Was super cool about it. Walked in and was all ‘Um… ok… cool… so um… Good morning buddy, time to get up.’
‘grumble… snort… morning’
Closes door and squeals. See. Super cool. Hoping for a repeat performance tonight.
And maybe, just maybe he could sleep in his own damn room that would be AWESOME.
Maybe eat a fucking vegetable.
Do you have any good news today? I really would love to hear it.