It has been a truly tiring trying few months.
And the last few weeks have been really testing my resolve.
I am finding it more and more difficult to express my feelings anywhere because where ever I try I am met by people telling me to shut the fuck up.
Well in not so many words.
But I get the jist.
The passive aggressive facebook statuses about me.
The endless texts/emails/messages all about you and then if I mention whats going on here, crickets.
The expectation that I will just be there to do everything all the time without question.
I bring this shit on myself, I know I do, I pretend everything is fine and dandy and OMG LOOK AT ALL MY CHRISTMAS TREES and OMG I AM SO EXCITED FOR CHRISTMAS and dazzle you with more and more happy and crazy status updates on facebook and twitter and in real life I am cleaning everything and so. very. joyful.
Meanwhile my body is falling apart while I am trying to hold everything together.
One more week.
And then I have two weeks off.
(except for Christmas, but CHRISTMAS!!!!)
Two weeks where I can just fall off the grid.
Hide from the world. Not have to interact.
I have bought a Tatts ticket for tonight.
Boo, MPS and I were in a music store checking out Boo’s dream guitar and then marched into the newsagent to buy a ticket.
And with my winnings, after buying Boo’s dream guitar because duh, I will be purchasing a ticket to somewhere… I dunno where… but I can see it in my minds eye…
HUGE bed with soft white bedding
I can see the ocean from my bed*, the cool breeze floating in
I wander down to the magnificent buffet breakfast, have my fill and then maybe back to my room with a plate of fruit for another nap or read a book or just lounge around doing nothing
perhaps a spot of shopping or nothing before a cocktail or two on my balcony watching the sunset…
oh. my. gah.
wake up to do it all again…
Maybe I will let MPS come along. I need someone to carry my bags and call room service.
I reckon my blood pressure just dropped into the single digits.
Motherfucking BLISS COMA!
Do you have any recommendations for my fantasy holiday?
What is your idea of a perfect buffet breakfast?
Who wants to come and take over my life for the next week so I can go on holidays early?
*or rolling hills, that could work. Wine country… SPA COUNTRY!