I had a hard night last night.
Well, to be completely honest, I have had a LOT of hard nights of late but last night was harder.
This no sleep bizzo, coupled with the fucknuckles at work and my general distain for the whole human race* has made me a tad less tolerant than usual.
After FINALLY sending Boo and MPS off to swimming lessons and instead of staying in bed being handed a latte and my ipad WHICH IS MY MOTHERFUCKING DUE, I cleaned the kitchen and then sat down to do some mindless surfing and perhaps check to see if my blog had been taken over by pirates or somesuch.
And that is when I saw it.
The straw that broke the camel with the lovely eyelashes – they’re REAL thanks Benefit – back.
I was fucking saving that.
Half last night and half today for sustenance before I braved the great unwashed of the Farmers Market trailing an untethered Boo with a pocket full of change.
I had to fight that little bastard for it saying it had hazelnuts in it and he totes doesn’t like hazelnuts and he was all I LOVE NUTELLA! While he swallowed a double Mars Bar whole.
Can’t I just have one thing?
Didn’t you think that maybe, perhaps, the fact that I left half a chocolate bar without just handing it to you to finish off may have meant that I kinda sorta wanted to eat it myself?
Those snickers hazelnut are fucking LIMITED EDITION DUDE. You can’t just get them anywhere you know.
What am I supposed to eat now? FRUIT or someshit?
Don’t mess with me. I am tired and hormonal and in desperate need of some alone time.
And half a motherfucking hazelnut snickers bar.
*except for you, obviously, I LOVE you. *kiss kiss*