Days where it is meeting upon meeting, all concentrating on deficits and not achievements.
I dropped my smiling boy off at school and arrived just on time to my first meeting.
A meeting to register my boy for social activities, to get out in the real world – with supports – with people his own age.
Two hours later, after painting my boy as the most horrific child ever to walk this earth (the GIRL is going to be there! THE GIRL AND MY BOY IN A SOCIAL SETTING. Fuck) to ensure that they are as prepared as possible for anything, I wearily drag myself to the car to go to yet another meeting.
Stopping home for a quick revitalising latte. And if I am brutally honest I would have killed someone for a stress relieving cigarette.
In the next meeting we talk about puberty and hormones and Boo’s tendency to shout ‘SCANDALOUS!’ when he doesn’t get his way.
And on to hygiene and strategies to get him learn to express his feelings.
Finishing up with an impromptu one on one in the carpark with his worker talking about strategies to deal with THE GIRL.
I want to shout to the world that he is fabulous and wonderful and hilarious and brave and adorable and caring and has the wickedest sense of humour in the world and PLEASE OH PLEASE CAN WE FOCUS ON THAT JUST ONCE?
But we have to focus on the negative. His awesomeness is not an issue. His awesomeness is WHY these people want to help him but it is so fucking hard when all we are focussing on is this small part of the whole.
Home again, just enough time to stare blankly into the pantry for something to eat before leaving again, and finding nothing.
Triple shot latte in a travel mug it is!
Get to school and meet with his teacher. Heads up on the days meetings and strategising about how to deal with THE BOY AND THE GIRL. And he saw a new OT. She wants to work with him privately.
Of course she does. Now I have another round of funding nightmare to break out the hoops for.
*deep exhausted sigh*
My boy wanders in.
‘Hey mum’
We wrap up the meeting and Boo and I walk to the car, where he tells me that he knows where to get the best sausage rolls in the world from, and maybe, one day, he can take me there for a treat.
He is smiling down at me and I smile back.
‘I would like that very much, buddy’
He is the glue that puts me back together.
{ 19 comments… read them below or add one }
Your son gets his AWESOMENESS from his mum, how could some of it not spilled down the cord during the 9 months you baked him?
To be honest, when I read your posts about Boo, even the ones where you’ve had a tough time, all I see is the love you have for him & I know these meetings would kill you. What parent wants to tear their child down but to help him this is what needs to be done. It is done out of love, not to mean. I hated it when I had to do it for my nephew, painting him in a negative light when all I wanted to do was ram down their throats how really wonderful he could be.
Hold your head high in the knowledge that your son ADORES you & wants to take you, if he can, for the worlds best sausage roll.
I’m sending you hot salty fries served with a Margarita & **calming vibes for the evening**
I’m worn out just reading about your day. So I’m sending hugs and virtual chocolate and wondering how I can stock your fridge/freezer with my homemade soup & some half-baked bread so you have something yummy to eat when you don’t know what to eat… <3
Tears reading for the second time today. Damnit.
Beautiful. Xxxxx
What a beautiful post…lets gets some giant chocolate chip cookies to dunk into your latte…
I know I should write something profound, but instead I just wanna say I’m so frickin proud of you for not grabbing a cigarette. And I obviously don’t know how to say that without sounding condescending, so apologies for that! xxx
Boo sounds all kinds of awesome. Clearly he gets this from his mother, who’s never ending love and devotion for her amazing son is awe inspiring. I know everyone loves their kids, but not everyone goes the extra second, third and fourth mile when they need to. Be proud of yourself, Kelley, you are a great mum, in a world where not everyone is.
xxx
Oh hun. So much love going your way.
What they^ said, plus I love how Boo shouts “Scandalous!”
It’s funnier than EFF YOU…
Did you really find nothing to eat in your pantry? Not even a skerrick of chocolate? That’s so sad.
It’s the little things they do. My nephew is the same. Even at 8 years old, he’ll say something that catches me off-guard and I’ll either be crying for love of him or laughing my fool head of. As he is the seed of my sister’s loins and has her impeccable-however-totally-accidental comedic timing, it’s usually pissing my pants laughing.
Gotta love the kids.
By the way… Nutella. Buy lots. It lives in the back of the pantry for such an occasion where there is “nothing to eat”.
Grr. OFF, not of. OFF! Dammit. Stoopid words.
Just once it would be great to celebrate what makes Boo so wonderful and awesome. I know how it is to have to focus on the negative so you can get what is needed. It sucks, sucks hard.
Just agreeing with the rest of the posse, what a sod of a day! But yay, Boo, way to make Mum feel better. 🙂
Any kids that attempts ‘Scandalous!’ when he doesn’t get his way is a hero in my book. I hope it gets easier for you … sounds hard. And make sure you order in some good food.
You make me cry lady.
Lady, your boy sounds just gorgeous.
I’m sending you all the love, hugs and positive energy that you can possibly absorb because I have no idea where to find the best sausage roll in the whole world and I wouldn’t like to take that away from Boo !!!
Thinking of you and wishing that your day gets better !
Me
Oh sweetheart I think of you often and need to tell you more how fucking awesome and beautiful you are.
Hope your Friday night is goin’ ok. Not thrilling, fabulous, ama-aa-aazing … just ok. Ok is nice.
XXXXXX eden
I am going to start yelling “Scandalous!” when I don’t get my way. Because I put that in the fabulous category. Focusing on the negative has to be so wearying… 🙁
I am sending you all of my love and strength. I really don’t know how you manage to stay so amazingly awesome dealing with all of these challenges.