You have been an integral part of our family for almost 18 years.
Your previous owner, an awesome rep from MPS’s station who used to bring me bread from a bakery 2 hours away whenever he was in town cause I said I liked it, sadly passed away in his sleep (‘dead in bed’ an awful name for a horribly sad death) and it was us or the Auction Houses in the city.
We gladly accepted you into our lives for half the value… CHA-CHING!
Over the years we have had our ups and downs, and of late I have been known to call you names like ‘piece of shit’ ‘fucking run down piece of shit’ and other versions of the same sort of fecal theme.
Which is hardly fair because I am pretty sure you are considered positively elderly in car years and the fact you are still pumping out 130-150 k’s a day on Boo’s special school days with only a few coughs and splutters and a high pitched squeal that only dogs and I can apparently fucking hear cause no one else can seem to find it and OMG WHY DOES THE AIR CON ONLY DECIDE TO DIE WHEN IT HITS 30C???
And we wont even speak of the tape deck.
But 18 years ago you were considered sexy and fucking hot, and lets be honest here the years have been relatively kind to you. When I disclose your age people are shocked and that time I was test driving that fucking HOT Mazda that cost almost as much as our first house SECOND HAND, the used car salesmen was positively giddy at the thought of us trading you in.
You still got it baby.
So, on the occasion of your 18th birthday we shall allow you to go into a dignified retirement.
damn girl, you get around…
You deserve it.
No more hundreds of kilometres a week.
No more abuse for not being able to fulfil my needs.
No more Boo fucking around with your seats and mirrors and bashing his knees on the dash.
You will only be required to ferry MPS to the next town when his car pooling buddy is skiving off work.
You will only need to tow the trailer to the tip or MOTY’s house every now and then.
You can have a long awaited rest while your
replacement assistant does all the grunt work.
Happy Birthday Rav4, we bought you a present…
stock image cause it is too dark outside to do it justice
Meet Honda CRV navi.
30k’s on the clock. OMG.
Let’s hope she serves us all well.
(omgomgomgomgomg can you believe it? Our first ever brand new car. Repayments the same as what we were spending on cigarettes two years ago. Mind boggling really)
Have you ever bought a brand new car?
Did you love yourself sick?
How much do you hate me right now? (so awesome to have people jealous of ME for a change!)