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Tears and disappointments.

by Kelley

in blogging, I haz a sad, meh

people shouldn't be angry

So much has been going on of late that I have curled up into a rather large misshapen ball of unhappiness, flinging glares and middle fingers at anyone and anything that comes into my field of vision.

No, nothing catastrophic has happened.  Just an endless stream of smouldering dripping shit from above, melding with crushing disappointments and defeats.

So much so, that the poor guy that sits next to me at work hears nothing but a stream of muttered profanities coming from my side of our shared partition.

And on the days where I am not forced to have human contact, I have sequestered myself from the world, choosing to spend my time screaming at All The Housewives Of All Of The Places on my TV and picking at my cuticles till they bleed.

Pretty much life as usual here at Chez Magnetobold.

Todays fuckupery that has me wailing at the sky and flopping myself heavily daintily on various forms of furniture for dramatic effect is nothing major (but everything), not going to kill anyone (but I may die from despair), and nothing really in the great scheme of things (OMG MY LIFE IS SO UNFAIR!!!), but I won’t be going to a bloggers conference where I was to wax lyrical on a panel about the haters and the trolls I have encountered in my journey across the interwebs, with my friends Glowless, Mrs Woog and Reservoir Dad.

And hug a lot of my friends that live in this virtual world of awesome.

And I am DEVASTATED.  COMPLETELY GUTTED.

Ready to cut a bitch.

There is no one to blame, no easy solutions, no one thing that stands in my way.

It is just life with a broken brain and a disabled kid and being surrounded by people that pretty much only want me around for what I can do for them.

Ooooh the bitter…

Whatever.  I shall spend the cash I had saved for margaritas and taxis on a fabulous pair of shoes.

Right?

Right.

So tell me, who is NOT going to the Digital Parents Conference and will keep me distracted and if you are going, who is going to swipe me some swag?

 

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{ 69 comments… read them below or add one }

1 Kate @ UpsideBackwards March 17, 2013 at 6:08 pm

I’m not going. And I’m kinda glad about that, because if I *was* going, I would have wanted to see you. So there’s a crushing disappointment averted.

Hugs!

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2 Kelley March 17, 2013 at 6:10 pm

well it is like I am doing a SERVICE, right?

Shall send you my bill in the mail.

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3 Michaela C March 17, 2013 at 6:08 pm

I’m not going. Devastated for us both.

Big mwahs.

Xxxx

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4 Kelley March 17, 2013 at 6:11 pm

we can have our own party. Synchronise our watches?

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5 Michaela C March 17, 2013 at 6:51 pm

And our whine glasses

X

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6 Rusty Hoe March 17, 2013 at 6:17 pm

Nope not going. I was thinking of losing myself in a bowl of Lindt’s finest till the tweeting and all the “OMG Best Conference EVA” blog posts are long past.

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7 Kelley March 19, 2013 at 7:16 pm

I am thinking of either hiding from the internet or randomly announcing BEST EVER things.

Like toast and bowel movements.

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8 river March 17, 2013 at 6:53 pm

Nope, not going, have no interest in another conference.
Hope somebody swipes you some swag.

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9 Dorothy @ Singular Insanity March 17, 2013 at 7:27 pm

I’m not going and very happy with my decision.

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10 Kelley March 19, 2013 at 7:16 pm

I guess if it was my decision, like with Problogger, it would be different. But I was really looking forward to the damn panel.

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11 Dorothy @ Singular Insanity March 21, 2013 at 12:55 pm

I’m sorry you had to miss out, Kel. Let’s hope the planets align better for you next year…

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12 SarahMac March 17, 2013 at 7:28 pm

I’m not going and I don’t even really know exactly what it is because I am a bit of a noob. But I’m so sorry you aren’t going how disappointing, I can totally imagine it 🙁
Like when I was 16 and my mum and I were going to go to my cousins wedding in Paris but she changed her plans and went with her new boyfriend instead. Crushing.

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13 veggie mama March 17, 2013 at 9:45 pm

shit, did you ever forgive her? I WOULDN’T HAVE!

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14 Kelley March 19, 2013 at 7:18 pm

yeah, I am with Veggie Mama, that is unforgivable.

🙁

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15 SawHole March 17, 2013 at 7:29 pm

I was meant to moderate that forum.
Fuck it, can’t go either.

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16 Kelley March 19, 2013 at 7:18 pm

I thought you were! But then I assumed it was my borked brain telling me stories.

We shall cry into our lattes together my friend.
x

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17 Madmother March 17, 2013 at 7:40 pm

Not going. Big Boy’s birthday takes precedence… the alcoholic slushies, friends deciding to provide the live music, and great company through to the wee hours made up for it somewhat.

Am glad now as you would have been one of my reasons for going…

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18 Kelley March 19, 2013 at 7:20 pm

That is why I never get to go to Problogger, birthdays always take precedence.

Mmmmm margarita slushies…

(we shall get together one day my lovely…)

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19 Nic McLachlan March 17, 2013 at 8:20 pm

Not going. Thought about it, then smacked self over head and reminded self that to go to a blogger’s conference, one must pull one’s finger out and blog occasionally. Duh. xx

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20 Kelley March 19, 2013 at 7:21 pm

meh… I don’t think it is a prerequisite.

90% of it is socialising anyway.

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21 Two Point Five Kids March 17, 2013 at 8:40 pm

Nope not going – but I think I need to be a real blogger to qualify. My latest post certainly doesn’t help 🙂 Can I buy shoes too?
Meet you on a cyber date?
xxx

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22 Kelley March 19, 2013 at 7:21 pm

as long as you wear your new shoes.

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23 Erin March 17, 2013 at 8:47 pm

Nooo I was sooo looking forward to meeting you 🙁

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24 Kelley March 19, 2013 at 7:21 pm

one day my friend.

I will hug you till you fart.

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25 Rachel March 17, 2013 at 9:04 pm

Bugger 🙁 It sucks when you’re looking forward to a treat and then you end up having to stay home and be a grown-up instead. I’m sad for you, but I’m even more sad for the other attendees because that panel will totally be lacking in awesome now.

I would have loved to have gone but general work/money/kids obstacles meant it was never more than a pipe dream for this year. I’ve decided the only way to stop myself from developing a Cinderella Complex is to avoid social media and use the time to write my ass off instead.

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26 Kelley March 19, 2013 at 7:22 pm

being a grown up sucks sometimes.

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27 Cadi's mum March 17, 2013 at 9:59 pm

I’m not going. I wasn’t invited. Probably because I don’t blog.

Happy to join your virtual margarita party though.

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28 Kelley March 19, 2013 at 7:23 pm

no one was invited my lovely! It is a buy your own ticket to go thingy.

And I am pretty sure that they don’t check if you have a blog.

Next time?

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29 Caroline March 17, 2013 at 10:14 pm

Not going either hun 🙁
think we should do a nonDPCON13 party for all not going

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30 Lisa Barton-Collins March 17, 2013 at 10:58 pm

I’m not going. I would LOVE to go, but I’ve been hot wiring my car for two years now because I can’t afford a new starter engine, so money for a conference in another city sure as shit isn’t there. I’m not even joking!
We should all have a bitter twitter pity party and get shit faced. Then they can Skype us on a big screen at the conference in all our bleary eyed glory and the drunken ‘I love youse!’ will ring around the world.
hugs
xx

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31 Kelley March 19, 2013 at 7:25 pm

this sounds so fucking awesome, we need to do it.

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32 Nikki @ Styling You March 18, 2013 at 12:22 am

My un-tattooed boobs are missing you already – anything decent swag wise I’ll send your way x

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33 Kelley March 19, 2013 at 7:26 pm

thanks gorgeous.

And I will tattoo you FIRST next time, deal?

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34 Mum Talks Autism March 18, 2013 at 12:27 am

One of my highlights was meeting you Kel but there is always another time. Much love. Coralie.

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35 Madmother March 18, 2013 at 9:01 am

Coralie,
were you there last year? Missed your International Women’s Day speech by 12 hours (had to return to Qld).

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36 Mum Talks Autism March 18, 2013 at 10:28 am

No Madmother (love your name by the way and can relate to that a little at the moment) I was not there last year as I had literally just found the fantastic world of blogging at the time.

it is a shame you missed International Women’s Day, Bree and the other ladies put on a fantastic day. Probably not a bad thing I seemed to make everyone cry. (Not desired affect for the record). Miss Cinders has said she should have taken out shares in Kleenex for my speech for Digital Parents Conference. So you will get a cut down version but if going off Miss Cinders advice , bring tissues. Look forward to meeting you.

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37 Madmother March 18, 2013 at 4:31 pm

Ah, just about the time I began to wane after 3 years on the blogathon.

May have to try and catch up on one of my southern trips down to my cottages. 😉

Enjoy the conference!

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38 Kelley March 19, 2013 at 7:26 pm

xx

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39 Lorraine @ Not Quite Nigella March 18, 2013 at 3:41 am

Not going babe but I’m sure it won’t be the same without you!

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40 Kelley March 19, 2013 at 7:28 pm

thanks lovely, there needs to be an ‘awesome fabulous bloggers conference’ that we can both rock the shit out of, yes?

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41 lceel March 18, 2013 at 3:59 am

OR – you could be me, whose wife has asked him for a divorce.

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42 Kelley March 19, 2013 at 7:28 pm

my heart is breaking for you Lou. x

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43 meleah rebeccah March 18, 2013 at 5:24 am

sorry to hear things are so crappy for you lately. But here’s to margaritas and fabulous shoes.

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44 Kelley March 19, 2013 at 7:28 pm

cheers my friend.

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45 Lisa B March 18, 2013 at 8:40 am

Not going either cos, you know, I don’t blog any more.

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46 eccentricess March 18, 2013 at 8:42 am

That bites.
The Universe needs to listen to more Cyndi Lauper, so it will learn that girls just wanna have fun.

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47 Renee | About a Bugg March 18, 2013 at 9:33 am

I’m not going either. It’s all too hard. Hard to be at home, harder to be away. The proverbial rock and the hard place. Chin up chick, we shall drink margaritas and talks shoes instead.

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48 Kelley March 19, 2013 at 7:29 pm

that we shall.

Going shoe shopping tomorrow.

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49 Trish March 18, 2013 at 9:38 am

Oh kelley, I am sorry to hear you are not going , really bites that reality bites hard. I was asked about a different forum but hubs work came first.
So I am not going either because it is a long story but turns out due a turn of events and disappointments , the work was cancelled last week – then a chance invitation offered up – so I’ll be in Sydney anyway.
Oh so close I will be but so far away.

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50 Kelley March 19, 2013 at 7:31 pm

oh Trish. Fucking universe can suck my flaccid imaginary male appendage on your behalf.
xx

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51 Rachel @ The Kids Are All Right March 18, 2013 at 11:20 am

Oh I’m disappointed too. I was looking forward to seeing you in the flesh even if I didn’t manage to get through the fans to say gday in person. I like Lisa Barton-Collins idea above – it should be streamed at the dinner. xx

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52 Kelley March 19, 2013 at 7:32 pm

oh stop it… I would have been the one hiding in the corner anyway.

Next time, yes?

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53 Caroline March 18, 2013 at 11:52 am

Not going and I’m ok with that 🙂

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54 Parental Parody March 18, 2013 at 1:08 pm

You and me both love. I’ll be sitting at home here in ye distant Perth, watching the Twitter stream with total jealousy. At least I can sit in my PJ’s and drink vodka far earlier at home than I could at the conference, amiright!?

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55 Kelley March 19, 2013 at 7:33 pm

not necessarily. Call it fashion and fill a drink bottle with tequila.

That was my plan anyway.

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56 Emily March 18, 2013 at 1:54 pm

Not going. Maybe if it was in Melbourne this year… who am I kidding, I have two weeks to go and can barely waddle to the front door, let alone through hotel conference rooms. I may be following along on twitter, but will more likely be having some hot dates with my bed and the inside of my eyelids. And chocolate, of course.

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57 Kelley March 19, 2013 at 7:34 pm

oh sleeeeeeeeeeep.

I need some more of that.

MWAH!

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58 Mandy March 18, 2013 at 3:56 pm

I’m not going either. sigh. you know, money, work, busy hubby, kids, blah blah blah. I’m sure we’re going to be big balls of envy this week. I might step away from my computer and get caught up in this busyness. Who am I kidding!

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59 Josefa @always Josefa March 18, 2013 at 4:48 pm

I’ll be holding the Fort here with you lovely, I would have loved to go – just to hear you speak all kinds of awesome – but it seems the Universe is saving that for another day. Hope you are ok? Hugs and cider xx

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60 Kelley March 19, 2013 at 7:35 pm

do you know that there is a PASSIONFRUIT CIDER?!?!?!

OMG.

I shall buy some and some new shoes and it will totally make up for not going. Right?

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61 edenland March 18, 2013 at 8:34 pm

I’m going. I want to make up impromptu MAGNETOBOLD WAZ ERE stickers, maybe Insta them on the dunnycan or something, cheer you up a bit.

I’ll postpak you some cake? Hey you know how you wrote “tacos” on my post today …… guess what my brain invented?

TACO CAKE.

I KNOW.

CAN YOU IMAGINE.

Layers of sour cream, corn chips, black beans and chill beef. In the shape of a CAKE.

We need to patent it. I’ll have our lawyers draw up contracts.

xxxxxxxx

PS GUACAMOLE FOR ICING

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62 Kelley March 19, 2013 at 7:37 pm

JESUS FUCKING CHRIST I WANT THAT NOW.

Next conference I am going to hold in my cubby house. And we will have a mexican theme.

Bring the maracas.

(wish I was there with you girl. You need one of my hugs. True story)

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63 Gina March 19, 2013 at 2:45 pm

Yesssss to purty shooeesssss….

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64 Kelley March 19, 2013 at 7:37 pm

always yes to purdy shoes.

Always.

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65 Deborah March 19, 2013 at 4:14 pm

Am childless…. so don’t think I’d fit in…. so I’ll be around.

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66 Kelley March 19, 2013 at 7:39 pm

I am actually annoyed at the name of the conference. There are many bloggers that don’t have kids that go, AND are speakers.

You would have been more than welcome and totally would have fit in my lovely.

We need to create our own fucking conference.

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67 Veronicali March 19, 2013 at 9:57 pm

Digital Passionfruit Cider Conference. Am making the cheesecake now.

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68 Farmers Wifey March 19, 2013 at 11:05 pm

My lovely, I’m not going. And I’m more pissed about not getting my booby tattoo this year 🙁 I’m sure some hot guys checked me out on the plane ride home last year with my ink. I’m hoping next year it’s in Brisbane, which would be so much easier! xo

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69 Kylez @ A Study in Contradictions April 17, 2013 at 7:10 pm

I must say, when I realised you weren’t there (because I was too busy being ridiculously nervous and freaked out in the lead-up that I couldn’t even blog let alone read other blogs) I was about ready to go and complain to someone that they had ruined my conferencing experience. Very sad to not have been able to bow down at your Harry-Potter-party-and-just-general-awesomeness, and to see if you sound the same in real life as you do in my head.

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