What the actual fuck?
So if you have been following along here you will know that I went back to work (according to my menstrual cycle) a month ago.
Isn’t that how everyone measures time now that the Mayan calendar has run out?
And coupled with the mindfuck that was Christmas, having to deal with MOTY and the whole daily begging and grovelling to her for babysitting of Boo BY MY FATHER, Boo growing a foot a day, random nosebleeds and the aforementioned menstrual cycle I am feeling a smidge overwhelmed by it all.
On Monday I worked an extra couple of hours (because management are under the impression that I owe them 5 hours and I can’t prove otherwise) and then I had to drive around the entire world dropping off and picking up people and even my appendix was exhausted.
And I had it removed in 2010.
THAT FUCKING TIRED.
(OK maybe I just had to drop off Dad and pick up MPS but it took longer than a double episode of Downton Abbey and I could have been sitting on my arse watching a double episode of Downton Abbey instead)
I got up Tuesday, threw on some random clothes full of COLOUR and SUNSHINE and made it into the office.
By lunchtime my brain had shut down and although I was doing the most banal of beige shit work I sat there and completely forgot how to type.
And breathe properly.
Yet I still had to be BUBBLY and FRIENDLY and I ACCEPT THAT IS YOUR OPINION BUT I DISAGREE AND THIS IS WHY
MOTHERFUCKER all the while keeping a very close eye on the clock cause I was not staying in that place a second longer than necessary.
Wednesday consisted of a lot of EMOTIONS and FEELINGS and liquids coming from my face and sitting on the couch watching Downton Abbey and All of the Housewives of All of the Places and texting friends shit meant for my husband.
And that brings us to today… where I have cleaned all of the things.
And didn’t moderate my EMOTIONS and FEELINGS and HULK RAGE whilst on social media.
And then pulled apart one of the bedrooms and now there is shit everywhere negating my cleaning of all of the things.
So I am back at square one with a metric fucktonne of shit lining the hallway with no where to go.
Tomorrow is going to be interesting.
Who wants to hazard a guess of what it will bring?
Running down the street naked save a teacosy on my head that I stole from the elderly neighbours across the street and to the right that have the most beautifully manicured lawns it just makes me want to spit?
Closest guess (or best idea) wins a pony.