So how freaking awesome have my guest posters been this week?
I know! And there are MORE!
And I kinda need them right now cause my funny or phunny or whatevz is in my other handbag, along with the stop button for the universe.
Tomorrow I go back to work after another couple of weeks off. Right now Boo is asleep beside me. Again. He has been asleep on and off since 4pm. This is happening more and more lately and is freaking me the fuck out.
Along with everything else that is freaking me the fuck out.
I am just one big motherfucking freak the fuck outerer.
But I have some nice little pills to take the edge off the freaking the fuck outering. Alas, they make me kinda sit around doing nothing in particular for hours on end and not conducive to doing shit that needs to be done.
As my girl Mr Lady says, Bygones…
And at least I don’t have swine flu. Cause that would just be the icing on the shit cake.
Anyway. Just popping in to share this:
(feedreaders will need to click over to see)
OMG is that the most adorable fucking thing you have ever fucking seen in your whole fucking fucked up fucker of a fucking life? Fuck me, I want me a fucking Slow Loris. As long as they don’t eat any weird shit, or shit or smell or anything.
On second thoughts, I will just watch this on loop.
P.S. That feels better, I have been bottling up the fucking fuck fucks and I thought I was going to explode or implode or something.
P.P.S. This post was supposed to be a thankyou for all the messages and thoughts and love you have all been sending me. It means the world to me and caused copious amounts of Big. Ugly. Cry. I love you all.
P.P.P.S Doing this the right way cause last time when I was all P.S.S.S.S cause I thought it was funny cause it totally looked like pssssssssssss and tickled my inner 12 year old, all the grammar Nazi’s fell off their chairs and penned concerned letters calling for my blogging licence.
P.P.P.P.S. Fucking fuck fuck fuckitiness, Moo just called and said that she in fact doesn’t need to be picked up from miles away and I could have cooked something a little tastier than chicken fucking nuggets for dinner. Where is the icecream?
P.P.P.P.P.S. Boo is still asleep so I ate his chicken nuggets.
P.P.P.P.P.P.S. I did it for the poor little African children.
P.P.P.P.P.P.P.S. The slow loris has some sort of toxin that they ooze from their elbows. Freaks.
{ 23 comments… read them below or add one }
What the fuck is that thing? It looks like a cross between a raccoon and a koala.
(See, like how I just threw that little “fuck” in there for the hell of it?)
Mwaaaah.
Robin’s last blog post..Firewood anyone?
One awefuckinsome post! That is what you get when you cross a blogger with acid!
-FK
That is freakin’ hilarious. I do the same thing when someone rubs my belly too.
I hope Boo is okay and is feeling better soon.
Tara R.’s last blog post..Weekly Winners ~ the earth and sky
Gee, the Geek thought that being a Piggie Slave was bad… admittedly, guinea pigs aren’t quite as cute as slow lorises.
Chookie’s last blog post..Bit of a Catch-Up
Fuck!
Can I have some not fucking freaking the fuck our fucking pills?
Oh, sure, it’s cute, but I wouldn’t put it past a slow loris to want to kill a person. My luck, I’d have one that I’d wake up in the middle of the night to find on my chest, staring at me, teeth bared.
Yeah. Tickle THAT!
foradifferentkindofgirl (fadkog)’s last blog post..i hope we can still be friends, though…
Maybe I am just weird or something, but that thing looks fucking creepy to me.
Karen’s last blog post..We Have Arrived
I find cussing entirely cathartic. I think everyone should do it. Except if everyone did it, then it would be socially acceptable and would probably lose its cathartic effect.
Fuck ya’ll I’m saying fuck, and Kelley can say fuck, and all the rest of you better fuckin not say a fuckin word.
Oh Kelley, I haven’t been able to comment this week, but know that I’ve been thinking about you. All the things you are going through, I wish you all the best.
You are a kick-ass fuckin’ woman, and things will work out. I promise.
Otherwise, I’m going to have to go kick some motherfuckin’ ass somewhere. I don’t know where exactly, but somewhere.
Gina’s last blog post..Friday Poll
I want a Slow Loris! I also want toxins to ooze from my elbows. I would have more room on the subway than I have ever dared to dream about.
Dingo’s last blog post..Disruptive
I love you more today. That is all.
gwendomama’s last blog post..I’m BACK!
I’m with Gwendomama. I also heart you big time!
Ps…I need one of those things, whatever the hell it was..I need one.
Sarah’s last blog post..I dont drink often….anymore.
I thought it was going to be animal porn. So I got all the animals in the house to watch. Now I have one helluva mess to clean up.
Doctor put me on some pills a year or so ago.
I called them Fukital, as I took them and thought Feck it all.
The kids called them my yell less medicine.
Look after yourself chook.
WiddleShamrock’s last blog post..FINALLY got some scrapbooking done
Can I help? FuckFuckFuckFuckFuckFuckFuckFuck
FuckFuckFuckFuckFuckFuckFuckFuckFuckFuckFuckFuck
FuckFuckFuckFuckFuckFuckFuckFuck
Feels much better.
Ree’s last blog post..Grace in Simple Things: 20/365
I shall lend you my favourite phrase I
stoleborrowed from Stephen Fry – Buttery Fuck.Go on, stick a plum in your mouth and start chanting “oh buttery fuck” and to mix things up a little “Oh, fuckity buck” (sounds like there’s a limerick in there !).
You could get really daring and try for “Bugger,bugger, shit, cack, fuckit in a hand basket, poo” but don’t utter that louder than a whisper in the laundry aisle of the supermarket or people will call store security and the RSPCA.
Jayne’s last blog post..I’ve been through the trivial desert on a history horse with no name May 4
Sending lots of love your way, Kelley. Lots and lots.
Fuck, that slow loris is both freaky and adorable at the same time, exactly the way I feel sometimes, usually on my good days. To the best of my knowledge I don’t have toxin-oozing elbows, though that might make a pretty fuckin’ awesome superpower.
Great. One more nutty animal I have to make sure my kids don’t ever find out about or we’ll have one and one more is the limit before we are eligible for a zoo’s tax write off.
Keep feeling better and better and better and…
ETC.!
Krissa’s last blog post..Me, me, me, meeeeeeeeeeee
well, fuck me if that isn’t the cutest thing ever!
Loris’s always make me freak cos they’re all slow and cute and shit and when I watch them on wildlife programs I’m always like ‘faster little Loris,faster before something fucking EATS you!!
And now I’m gonna cry even more cos I had no idea the little bastards were so darn partial to a good rub down…and I want one for Mothers Day..
shelly’s last blog post..I HEART DEXTER…
I’ve been swearing quite a bit myself lately. It’s a bit worrying because I’m not the swearing kind, obviously things are bothering me more than I thought. Not to worry though, things are bound to improve. After all, when you hit rock bottom, the only place to go is up. Right? Oh, and winning the next Lotto draw would help too. Ya listenin’ God? Gods? Goddesses? Deities of all kinds?
Wish I could offer some helpful words. My life’s been spinning out of control lately, so FUCK has been one of my favorite utterances.
{{{more hugs}}}
Kel’s last blog post..Resolve
Glad to see you’re back, at least for a little while. Thanks for the obscenities and the Slow Loris. I want me one of those …
dizzy mum’s last blog post..Beaches, burgers, and ‘the Baconater’
Like, I HAVE TO GOOGLE and learn more about that little thing Loris thing!!! I have NEVER seen anything like it and OMG, the look on its (don’t know boy or girl although I’m thinking boy casue of the way she pointed) face while it got its little rubdown…fuck me sideways it was soooo frickin cute……hang in there girlfriend…you are moving in the right direction, really, you are…..
hotmamamia’s last blog post..life has been interesting lately