I am so tired.
Every inch of my body is heavy.
People call or drop in and I am all sweetness and light (shut up. I am.) and then I crash in a heap when I am alone.
I am so tired.
So many things going on. So many things to cope with on top of the last week, that seems like a dream. Some I will share with you all, my friends, some I will hold close to my chest and get something in my eye when I think no one is looking.
I know you come here looking for the silly, the pissed off, the awesomicity.
I just don’t have it right now. But I feel like I owe you all an explaination. Because you are my friends. Because I love and appreciate every single one of you. Even the haters, especially the haters cause you make me feel even more awesome.
I am lurking on your blogs. I want to comment (and sometimes think I have and then find I haven’t. WTF?) but I am
Apparently my brain is healing itself. I think the enormity of it all has just hit me.
I cannot put that into words.
So instead of trying to install a plugin widget poll thingy I ask you to tell me:
(a) want to hear all about my ‘incident’ and then the minutiae of my hospital stay?
(b) want me to get over myself already and start being just fucking awesome again?
(c) want a summary of the whole week in one long arsed post?
(d) wonder how the fuck you got here and who is this freaking whiner and can’t get back to Dooce quick enough?
Before I go I just wanna start with the thankyou’s.
First, thanks to Karen from Miscellaneous Mum for these:
Mmmmm, chocolate. Had the whole ward buzzing when it arrived by courier. And what you cannot see in that awesomely composed and cropped pic from my phone (shut the fuck up. I don’t know if you know but I am too freaking tired for all this cropping shit, took me like 5 minutes to remember how to do the linky thing) is the gingerbread flower that I had to hide from the nurses. Ommmm nommm nommm.
(yes that is Charmander behind it. There is a story about that. Of course)
Then, thanks SueBlimely for making this site for me to make me smile. And smile I did (even if there was a tiny little urge to kick a kitten, but I am totally allowed to)
And finally a huge MWAH to my girl Mr Lady from Whiskey in my sippy cup for talking me off a ledge before my MRI and then calling me again when I got home. From Canada. Hearing her adorable Canadian American accent was almost worth destroying part of my brain.
I kid, I kid.
Now answer my questions and let me sleep already, dammit.