Oh God Oh God Oh God Oh God Oh God Oh God Oh God Oh God Oh God Oh God Oh God Oh God
Oh how I wish I was saying this in pleasure…
Madness has descended and it smells like chocolate. Oh wait, that would be me. Chocolate has caffeine in it right? And smeared all over your face in a mad feeding frenzy means that I can absorb it transdermally. Like the use of long words? Awesome.
This week has been insanely insane. Like more insane than is usual in the Magneto Bold household.
It is school holidays. Madness is a given. Stoopid kids. Don’t come to me saying you are bored cause the floor needs mopping.
My job was reclassified. At a higher level. Ergo, Kelley and every other fucker in the world is applying for it. Writing job applications with Boo running around is not conducive for ‘identifying changes required to reflect current practices’ and ‘liaising with stakeholders’ and ‘I fucking rock and WTF? Just give me more cash biatches and where is my damn latte’ sort of wankings. Oh, and did I mention that they are looking for a ‘positive’ person. I have positive coming out my arse baby.
Monday and Tuesday nights were devoted to ‘blah blah blah I am freaking awesome *insert corporate speak here* see?! Cause I do lots of shit while I am fabulously fabulousing , and I did THIS and THIS and FMD how awesome was it when I initiated THIS and THIS and where is my damn latte’ peppered with my family madness.
Then me freaking the fuck out at my blog being OFF LINE and BROKEN like a BAJILLION times over the last few days and Boo standing in the kitchen singing in a sweet voice while making a mayonaise sandwich ‘fear me. Fear me. FEAR MEEEEEEEE!’
And working extra hours the last few days to try and finish a heap of projects before my position ended today, oh and lets not mention the HUMUNGOUS fucking project that was someone elses job dropped on my lap at the last minute needing to be finished and presented to the like really really REALLY big knobs (like you have no idea how BIG this knob important this person is) and I am all ‘I can do it cause I rock’ all the while with this song stuck in my head:
Trying to take a break from the 8th freaking redraft of the ginormous addressage of the selection criteria and finding we are shaped (an Aussie thing when you go over your allocated bandwidth and are slowed down to dial up. DIAL UP PEOPLE! How the fuck did people COPE back in the olden days?) cause Boo keeps downloading the same song over and over and over from YouTube. Ring ring ring ring ring ring ring banana phone. Shit. Fuck. Goddammit!
Finally finish the application, flick myself an email with it attached to work and then fall into bed. And then greeted with a boy who is warming up for an all night rave party. Lay while he dances and flings himself off walls with the freaking song looping in my head. He finally falls asleep as the sun is peeking under the drapes saying ‘Good morning sucka! Get your fat arse outta bed and go to work bwaaaaa haaaa haaaaaaa!’ Bitch.
Race around, get to work and snarl at anyone ANYONE even looking like they are gunna ask me something. I HAVE to get this shit finished and organise my childrens social lives and celebrate Sue’s birthday HAPPY BIRTHDAY GORGEOUS!!! and talk a couple of people off metaphorical ledges, and stress about the state of my eyebrows and I dunno, get this shit done before leaving for the day. Lets not forget packing up my desk *sob* and moving back to my old team until the successful
arsehats applicants are announced.
Coffee bitch wanders over. ‘Oh, I forgot to tell you, I have organised for you to stay here till the selection process is completed’. Fucker.
chuck a tantie decide to leave work for the day, 2 hours after I should have finished but 3 hours less than I was expecting, and go home to the land of medieval internet speeds and freaked out children.
Is it bed time yet?
Don’t forget to link to your posts about your awesomeness in the previous post. I am loving the posts so far! You all freaking ROCK!
And MPS is on the phone to the internet provider to get us some more juice. Might have to sell one of the kids to pay for it. But which one? They all deserve to go right now.