You know when you have one of those days where you wake up in the morning, late, and every fucker wants to have a shower ahead of you and then you have to settle for a wash in the sink and then you try and straighten your hair and then every fucker gets in your way and you never actually get around to finishing and go to work with half straightened hair and you don’t realise for a couple of hours and then every fucker wants a piece of you and then when you finally finish and go to school to pick up your kid and every fucker wants a piece of you and only for bad fucking news and while they are all bitching at you at once and other fuckers are waiting BEHIND those fuckers wanting a piece of you and you get the heel of your favourite shoes stuck in a step and everyone holds their breath to see if you cry and then your child has a meltdown that you coin Epic Meltdown 2008 and then it goes for 2 fucking hours and then when you think that it is finally over turns out he is just warming up and then goes on for another 2 fucking hours and that means you are not going to get to the grocery store and every fucker is complaining that there is nothing to eat and then screaming child decides that he is over running out into the street to scream and hear his screams bounce off all the houses in the neigbourhood while the neighbours peek out their windows and he takes a breath and demands a particular pair of pants that are sitting in the dryer waiting for you to turn the fucker on, but you were distracted by the fact your brain has liquefied from the constant high pitch screams coming from said child and you try and try to explain to the child that they are wet and he insists on wearing them anyway and you are all ‘fuck it’ and let him wear them anyway, anything to stop the screaming and then you check the answering service and it turns out the fucking bank fucked up ALL of your automatic payments and you are in arrears for every fucking thing at the tune of thousands of fucking dollars and then your husband is all fucking ‘woe is me I have a sore ankle’ and then you lose your fucking mind and just want to rip off every fuckers head and shit down their neck and then you go on the internet and write the longest run on sentence with a world record for the use of the word ‘and’ in a sentence?
Days like that suck don’t they?
And if this fucking post don’t get my fucking blog banned from every fuckers fucking work fucking fuckity fuck fucker filters then I don’t know what the fuck else will.
Fuck. Damn. That feels better.