Wanna be my stalker?
Well then you will need some facts about me then. Let me help you out. A girl can never have too many stalkers.
- I am 35ish – apparently getting closer to death with every day (thankyou E)
- I live in Hicksville, Australia (well it’s not called Hicksville, but regional Australia if you know what that means……)
- I am shoe obsessed. I adore shoes. Want me to follow you? Tell me you are going to a half off shoe sale.
- I NEED coffee. Mainline drip would be my preference, but I will settle for MPS being my personal barissta.
- Chocolate. NOW. Dark please.
- Shoes need to be matched with your handbag.
- NEVER wear black socks with white shoes. Scratch that. Never wear white shoes unless they are running shoes.
- In my spare time I scour the stores to find the perfect nail colour. Best day ever was when I matched my nails to my lips and then to my bag! But I couldn’t leave the house cause my shoes didn’t match.
- I am a good friend. I am fiercely protective of my friends, unless they are good blog fodder then all bets are off.
- I love to renovate. I own all sorts of power tools and my parents gave me a mitre saw and lathe for my 30th birthday.
- I own a pink furry tool belt.
- my nails are so strong that I can screw up nails with them. However when they break they break down in the nail bed causing me to whinge a lot
- My favourite feature is my waist length hair. It is thick and straight and shiny. In reality it is thick and curly and scruffy so I spend hours straightening and treating it.
- I can run FAST in 6 inch heels. Lots of practice in parking lots with my Boo
- I call my daughters biatch…… and they answer to it.
- My favourite movies of all time are Life of Brian, Pulp Fiction and Gone with the Wind. Yeah, I am a freaky chick.
- I can sing, type and hold a conversation at the same time. With no spelling mistakes.
- My kids are the joy and light of my life.
{ 5 comments… read them below or add one }
Hehehe – thank you for the giggle to start my morning
And for the inner rage that was building when reading the Johnny Vs Autism saga – got the adrenalin going! Maybe I’ll take it out on cleaning my floors, but not likely.
Nail polish/lipstick/handbag – that is something my girlfriend would do – she is also a “never leave the house without matching bra/knickers” kinda girl.
Do you live in Moe???? I’m a Cranny girl and yes, I love moccies – but mine have died
Will be back on the fly list soon!
Hi Mandy.
Hope the floors end up shiny!
Nah, I don’t live in Moe. What ever would give you that idea? I don’t think I would be allowed in cause I don’t own any moccies…. they don’t make them with heels.
Cranny girl? Sounds kinky!
I think you might be my Aussie hero.
I love shoes, but can’t afford them, so I only have a small boring collection.
I have soft nails but they grow nicely, they just bend easily and I never paint them.
I only love dark chocolate. The other is too sweet.
I call my sons freaks.
So we are like half-wit soul sisters across the ponds.. right? Or not.
Kelley,
your blog is a classic – I just read a few posts and laughed till I cried – I will review your blog anyway because you said on Riayn’s that I wouldn’t.
Laugh? I near sh*t myself!
Thanks, Andrew
You are funny, I’m going to enjoy reading your blog.
Joh