I have been awake since 4am.
Boo has been awake since before then I am sure, but around that time some rather loud shrieking was emanating from his room and startled me from my feverish slumber.
As an aside, HOW FUCKING HOT IS IT OMG THE HELL IS THIS IN MARCH? WHEN WILL IT ENNNNNDDDDD?
The noise settled, so I laid there listening to his muffled giggles for a while and then the house shook as he vaulted out of bed and lumbered down to the loo and then the kitchen to get a drink.
After slamming his door, so thoughtful, the shrieking recommenced so I fumbled for my phone and texted* the fucking arsehole in the room next door that I used to call my darling son.
Oh no he didn’t.
I threw on some clothes cause it is hotter than fuck and I am not wearing no shit to bed in this weather and went in to chat with my little darling about how I was about to turn off not only the internet but the fan in his room if he didn’t show me some damn respect AND GO TO DAMN SLEEP and he was all ‘can you like, put a bra on?’
I swear to Gah, if that kid wasn’t on the other side of the room and it wasn’t a billion degrees and 5am and I wasn’t in danger of stepping on my own nipple, I would have gone over there and slapped him upside the head.
I never did find out what the screaming was.
By that stage I really didn’t care. He ended up falling asleep anyway and I started obsessing about decorating for Easter and the fact that I have to go to the dentist and watching the looming blizzard in New York on Good Morning America so never actually got back to sleep anyway.
I should mention here that my stomach has been playing up and I had to give up coffee 3 days ago. As you can imagine I am even MORE pleasant to be around.
*texted? text? It seems weird to just write text, but I am told it is just text not texted? What say you? It fucks with my head.
P.S. Ten bucks says his aide complains that he was tired today and says something about his sleeping habits AGAIN. Yeah. I have COMPLETE control over an 18 year old Autistic man mountain.
P.P.S. Coffee enemas are a thing, yeah? Asking for a friend.
P.P.P.S. So tired.