Thats right, friends! The 12 Days of Kelley!
Sure, yesterday signalled the start of Lent for all you Catholic types, and oh yes indeedy it is supposed to be the end of the hell that is summer and the start of the absolute BLISS that is the bestest of all the seasons that is Autumn, but it is also the countdown to mah birthday.
The time that I do a little somethin, somethin for myself every damn day for 12 days just like Jesus wanted.
Clearly I didn’t read the Bible or step into a church or anything. Lest I burst into flames or get some education.
Every year, in the lead up to my birthday I do something nice for myself every day for 12 days. Now the last few years have been pretty fucking shitful with the no eating and the almost dying and parents having fucking operations (of course my Daddy is going in tomorrow omgfuckinggodpleasebeok sure it is just a colonoscopy but you never know with this man) and whathaveyou, but this year with the botoxerizing and mcshizzle I am DETERMINED WHOOP THIS SHIT UP.
And, as always my birthday falls smack bang in the middle of a long weekend.
Organised just for my Victorian peeps.
You are welcome. I am totally about the giving.
I am a benevolent Princess.
(I ain’t no Queen, that shit comes with responsibilities. I just want the parties and diamonds thankyouverymuch. I saw The Crown. No thanks)
Anywhoodle. On my first day of Kelley my true me gave to me…
A fucking shower cause I damn well needed one. And when your body is as fucked up as mine you know how big a gift a big ol’ lathering, hair washing, shave all your bits shower is.
I might find something else to gift myself with after I have a nap from all the effort from getting clean.
Because really it was more a gift to the world than to me, right?