Blogging has changed a LOT since I first opened a WordPress dashboard and started spewing my thoughts on the internet. It is less about community and more about clicks and links, freebees and revenue.
And, like the old fogey of the internet I am, I am clinging on for dear life to the old ways while screaming at the new flashy kids to get the fuck off my bloggy lawn.
All the while realising that the definition of a blogger has shifted and I am no longer a blogger because:
I don’t own a Thermomix. I had a Kitchenaid before The Pioneer Woman started giving them out like lollies and they became a thing.
I have never tasted Kale or drank my smoothie out of a fucking jar. Nor I want to. Ewww.
Looks like swimming pool sludge.
Coconut oil is for makeup removal. Why are you eating it?
I don’t run. No amount of pain killers in the world would cure the headache that would result from my arse slapping me in the back of the head..
I have no idea how to schedule a facebook post. And no idea why you would want to… WTF?
You wont find any pictures of my kids on my blog.
I don’t know anything about growing my blog or optimising shit for google searches. Last time I tried that shit my torn achilles brought all the foot fetishers to my yard.
My blog/instagram pictures are straight out of the camera ap. I have a ton of filters and shit but no idea nor inclination to use them. What you see is what I saw.
I don’t have an e-book. Or a book deal in the works. But I am totally open to offers 😉
I don’t do those click baity howevermany ways/reasons to do whatever things. Oops.
Got any to add?
Totally offended by my list?
An old school blogger ready for a revolution to take back our internet? Just after we take our meds and have a little nap…