Yesterday I decided that as of today I am going to be the Princess, nay the QUEEN, of suck it the hell up and swan around being awesome.
Yesterday I decided that as of today thoughts of my blogging buddies at a awesome weekend away with massages (mine is booked for 11) and cocktails and laughter and MOTHERFUCKING JUMPING PILLOWS OMG that I had to regretfully withdraw from because I was gifted cellulitis of the face by my beautician would NOT plummet me into the depths of woe is fucking me.
Yesterday I decided that despite the fact I have a meeting with my bosses boss on Wednesday morning ‘to discuss your options’, and MPS’s job is hanging by a thread through no fault of his own, and Boo’s specialist school just lost a fuck tonne of funding (thankyou Mr Motherfucking Baillieu. I shall see YOU in HELL) which could potentially mean he can no longer attend, from today I would be the image of sunshine and rainbows and motherfucking positivity.
Yesterday I lamented that everything I love is taken away from me while MPS became the Hacker Slayer and evicted the spineless tiny dicked living in their mothers basement covered in cheese flavoured home brand snack dust, wearing last weeks underwear inside out, call their left hand Gloria cause that is the only way they will get a girlfriend hacker fuckers from my blog, but today I will rejoice that I was not one of the aforementioned suck a syphilitic dick and die from rotting semen filled intestines hacker fucks.
Yesterday I allowed all this and more that I can’t speak of weigh heavily on my mind, safe in the knowledge that today I would suck it up and be awesome again.
So as of today, I have a change in attitude.
None of the above is my fault. I cannot control what happens to me, just how I react to it.
I chose denial.
With a drop of crazy.
I shall throw my shoulders back, boobs out, chin up and laugh in the face of everyone.
Fuck it all, I am The Queen of Awesome and you shall not bring me down.
So, where is my credit card? I need to go and buy a unicorn.