June 2011

Cry

Tomorrow it will be four weeks. And Monday I go back to work. It is hard to believe that it was only four weeks ago, and that I have spent this much time at home without a newborn. I am still pretty much a mess, but life goes on. I got MPS to download me [...]

Rate this post biatches.

Awesome (0) Fabulous (0) WTF (0) Day-um (1) Suckage (1)

13 comments continue →

Gosh darn it, we done gone all citified and shit.

Last night I did something that I have been pining to do for years. Something that I have been sitting here seething with jealousy when people casually tweet it, like it is something that anyone can do any time. I would go to the website and pretend. Wishing for the day that I could join [...]

Rate this post biatches.

Awesome (1) Fabulous (0) WTF (0) Day-um (0) Suckage (0)

35 comments continue →

Recalibrating my brain. Setting it to zen.

{source} So I took a day or five off. And I am all motherfucking zen and shit. I even started yoga. FUCKING YOGA, PEOPLE?!?! Zen. I might go and get a chinese symbol tattoo on my lower back. I am thinking ‘no matter how much you dress it up, soup ain’t dinner motherfucker’ Cause that [...]

Rate this post biatches.

Awesome (4) Fabulous (0) WTF (0) Day-um (0) Suckage (0)

33 comments continue →

Today and tomorrow.

http://magnetoboldtoo.com/wp-content/uploads/2011/06/justdoit2.jpg

Today: Today I had a huge meeting with Boo’s disability funding provider. It didn’t go well and stressed me the fuck out. Today Moo and I spent a lovely morning wandering around window shopping. And she bought me brownies from KFC. Nom Today I bought knives while people on twitter were trying to increase my [...]

Rate this post biatches.

Awesome (3) Fabulous (0) WTF (0) Day-um (0) Suckage (0)

36 comments continue →

My doctor is fucking awesome. Or George Michael.

http://magnetoboldtoo.com/wp-content/uploads/2011/06/choose-life2.jpg

So I went back to my doc today to get a top up of my chill the fuck out meds, a certificate for my work who are motherfucking arsehats making me bring in medical certificates to PROVE I had a fucking stroke and have a little chatty chat about my propensity to fart in my [...]

Rate this post biatches.

Awesome (5) Fabulous (0) WTF (0) Day-um (0) Suckage (0)

30 comments continue →

He cradles my face in his hands.

I get him ready. Saturday morning and it is swimming day. Daddy and son time. We stand in the bathroom – his dressing room, finally graduating from the lounge now that he is a ‘bigger boy’ – and I pull the shirt over his head while he looks deep into my eyes I melt. Just [...]

Rate this post biatches.

Awesome (1) Fabulous (2) WTF (1) Day-um (0) Suckage (0)

28 comments continue →

Today I had a huge meeting at Boo’s school and I didn’t cry once. I think.

I am still trying to get a handle on all the chemicals that are flowing around in my brain and hard things like WORDS and SPELLING (I totally first wrote ‘chemicals that are FOLLOWING around BRIAN’ and then was all who the fuck is Brian? And then one part of my brain was all ‘oh [...]

Rate this post biatches.

Awesome (3) Fabulous (0) WTF (0) Day-um (0) Suckage (0)

19 comments continue →

True colours

Apparently after a stroke it is normal to have your emotions all over the fucking place. Like when I was pregnant, one minute I am OK and the next I am either a blubbering mess or white hot blood boiling insanely fucking outraged. So yeah, maybe I am not the best judge of character right [...]

Rate this post biatches.

Awesome (5) Fabulous (1) WTF (0) Day-um (0) Suckage (0)

32 comments continue →

If a this doesn’t make you laugh till you fart then you are totally dead. OR my laughometre needs re-calibrating. In that case I better close my etsy store cause no one wants to buy a defective laughometre even if it does have a baby with a moustache on it. Dammit, I totally ruined the surprise of the post and now you wont be clicking over to earn me well, pretty much fuck all. Send cash.

stolen from here I totally think this guy is named Mr Darcy. Rate this post biatches.Awesome (1) Fabulous (1) WTF (0) Day-um (0) Suckage (0)

Rate this post biatches.

Awesome (1) Fabulous (1) WTF (0) Day-um (0) Suckage (0)

13 comments continue →

I have four hundred billion things to post about but barely the energy to write a post title. So I will squeeze it all into said post title and try to outwit my brain… OMG IT IS WORKING take that stroke brain! HUZZAH!

zzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz *face plant keyboard* Fuck me dead I am tired. But not dead. So please stop freaking out. Love you longer than the hooker in the Thai bar that shoots ping pong balls out her who-ha. Rate this post biatches.Awesome (4) Fabulous (0) WTF (0) Day-um (0) Suckage (0)