March 2011

Where do you go when you go?

Yeah, I kinda disappeared for a while. Those new here would be all ‘what the fuck?’ and those that are not would know that I do this shit sometimes. I just like, turn off. There is no rhyme nor reason to it, sometimes I am overwhelmed by it all. Sometimes I am just meh. Sometimes [...]

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Conference of awesomeness. Alternate title: Fuck you Ed-eeeeeeeee

When I arrived at the conference centre I was shitting bricks. Literally. Well maybe not literally as I had me a case of the ‘fuck I am so nervous my intestines have shut down’ So anally retentive, literally. TMI? Meh. Anyway… I was standing in the lobby contemplating turning around and hopping in the next [...]

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Hugging hundreds of excited women is good for the soul but detrimental to your health.

I am sick. So fucking sick. I never get sick. Well I get exotic diseases and sports injuries but I never catch lurgies. But it seems that I picked me up some at AusBlogCon. Reading all the wonderful posts about the conference, there seemed to be a common theme ‘I was sick for the week [...]

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We interrupt the scheduled squeee fest for a bit of reality.

Yeah, I know I only posted a couple of hours ago. For a chick who blogs like sporadically, another post is a fucking huge thing. But shit is shit and shit needs to be shared. Especially seeing I lost mah Mothers Little Helper in Sydney. Fuck it. Boo’s school has a new vice principal. Nice [...]

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The day I got felt up by Dolph Lundgren, outed myself as a blogger and ate cake.

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I have never had a desire to go to Sydney. Never even entered my mind that I would travel to that city. Let alone ON MY OWN. But last week I jumped in the car for the three hour trip to the airport with a bag filled the the brim with pretty much everything hanging [...]

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What happens at a blog conference full of emotional and then very drunk women, stays at a blog conference full of very emotional and then very drunk women.

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Except when you have been branded by MB2. Laura’s trampstampage I spent a lot of the time at the conference fondling womens boobs – and one man – branded a few necks and shoulder blades with my awesomeness and as pictured above one rather lovely arse. I am REALLY glad my sister-in-love insisted on a [...]

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Something you need to watch before you meet me. Or read my blog. I call it desensitisation.

I find it rather ironic that I am going to a blogging conference and I will be offline for much of the time. No internet access for 2 days and then sporadically after that. Kinda like going to a meeting of shoe aficionados wearing Crocs. Totally inappropriate. I have set this to publish while I [...]

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MB2 tips on flying.

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I have been in an aeroplane three times in my life. The first was when a boyfriend decided that he would ‘surprise’ me with a joy flight. By the time we got to the airport, I was so relived that we drove PAST his parents place and didn’t go in to meet them that I [...]

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Why is everyone on the internet so really really ridiculously good looking?

I am having a moment of insecurity. I mean, I KNOW I am teh awesome and fabulous and fucking AWESOME and all, but I am feeling a little insecure. Cause every damn picture I see on the internet is of smiling happy BEAUTIFUL people. You are all so damn good looking. And I feel a [...]

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…and that’s terrible.

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Too always said that the day I turned 40 she would make me a card out of this: Seriously the fucker can have all the damn cake. But if he touches my margaritas I will be forced to do something very unladylike. Happy fucking fortieth birthday to me. That’s as many as four tens. And [...]