So very tired.
Tired as a side effect of all the medications.
Tired cause my body is healing.
Tired because I have to be strong.
Tired of being strong.
Tired because this wading through the neck high shit seems to be the new normal.
Tired of smiling through the stench.
Tired of trying to find the silver lining for everyone else, while taking on the burden. The burden of building them up while tearing myself down.
Tired of begging for help. And apologising for asking.
So very very tired of it all.
I have a bag of medications that could take the tired away.
Take it all away.
Never be tired again.
But that is not an option. Never an option.
I will try and acclimatise to this new level of normal.
And fake it till I make it.
And be gentle with myself.
Let myself break a little.
Just a little bit.
Not any more than I can put back together.
Because you are my Kings Horses.
You are my Kings Men.
And you help me put myself together again.