At work, doing my shizzle and according to A of ‘Marcus’ fame, I was rocking some serious Audrey Hepburn moves with my black ensemble, flat shoes (*sob*) and hair slicked back into a high ponytail. Something I could do now, since the great hair lopping of 2010 and subsequent immediate loss of 10 kilos in hair weight. Before hand, if I put my hair in a ponytail the sheer weight of all my hair would pull it out.
Therefore I was totally rocking The Audrey.
But something was seriously cramping my style.
I had a headache. I tried everything humanly possible to treat the said headacheyness – coffee, water, paracetamol, eating every damn thing on the tea room table {OMG the cheese was amazing!} – and then sitting down with my face planted on the cool surface of my desk I admitted defeat and sauntered over to Coffee Bitch’s desk.
‘I am going home. I just cannot shake this headache’
A look passed between some of my coworkers which I chose to ignore and went home to sit in some darkness for a bit…
A few days later, back at work, Coffee Bitch came up to me. A look of concern in on his face.
‘How is the headache? I was so worried about you. I was going to call but didn’t want you to think I was pressuring you or anything…’
‘Oh. Um. About that…’
I had gone home with aforementioned headache and sat in the aforementioned dark. I decided to lay down in the hopes of alleviating the aforementioned ratfucksonofabitch pounding in my head. I took out the aforementioned rocking of the ponytail…
…and my headache went away.
Turns out, when you have the weight of a small child lopped off your head and you put the remnants in a ponytail, the hair band loops around a few more times than usual and can totally make everyone think you are about to have a damn stroke.
{ 22 comments… read them below or add one }
Bwahahaa! See, I knew hair-cutting was a bad idea. Better get some smaller sized hair bands.
And doesn’t Audrey look great in flat shoes? 😉
.-= spotrick´s last blog ..How to fix the third world? =-.
Ballet flats are sooo back in, the bitchin’ colours in the shops were making me drool (electric BLUE!!! in SUEDE!!!!).
Yes, ponytail headaches are a PITA.
.-= Jayne´s last blog ..They do not represent the majority of Aussies but I would like to apologise for their purile behaviour =-.
Well, you got half a day off though, right? Bring on the too tight hair tie.
.-= Ali´s last blog ..Adjusting the fat paradigm =-.
I am laughing at you. Not with; at.
Chop it ALL off, I swear, it is brilliant. No maintenance whatsoever is gold.
.-= Del´s last blog ..Displaying my pretties =-.
…and yet I’m still so jealous of anyone with thick hair….
.-= Amanda´s last blog ..Sir Ken Robinson should be knighted … oh wait… =-.
The only way I could rock the Audrey is if I threw a few at her. Sleek and lady-ish I am not.
I’m totally hearing you on the ponytail. I remember those bitches from when I was a kid and my mom insisted on pulling the hair so tight she changed my ethnicity.
I now rock the “cut it off before I shave it”.
.-= Jessica´s last blog ..Danka =-.
Cut da hair, woman! It is sooo liberating! And I would wear my hair any way necessary if for one second I looked like Audry Hepburn! Ponytail included.
.-= Krissa´s last blog ..Voo-Doo and Cookies…voo-doo cookies? =-.
LOL! Oh well, at least you know now, and you got a half-day at work! 😉
.-= Marylin´s last blog ..Lazy-Bum =-.
As the victim of several headband headaches, I TOTALLY understand and feel your short-lived pain!
.-= foradifferentkindofgirl (fadkog)´s last blog ..hey kids! i’ve got a question for you! =-.
Ha Ha, I knew straight away the ponytail was the problem. I have the same headache whenever I suddenly decide to part my hair on the other side for a day. When you do the ponytail, just pull the band back a little after you’ve finished looping it, it releases the tension in the scalp a bit.
This is an absolutely tragic story.
.-= Stimey´s last blog ..I Tip My Hat to You =-.
I thought I was the only one who cussed like that.
.-= Glynis´s last blog ..Done In By A Doorknob =-.
I know that look. “Mr. Busdriver, Mr. Busdriver, please open the door.
Oh yep that is so true about ponytails-I try and wear mine quite low as that seems to help somewhat. What I can’t figure out is why didn’t we get headaches when we little though and always wore our hair in ponytails?
That’s not funny, but it is… I had the same kind of headache last week, but only because I was wearing a ball hat that was too small. Amazing how much better it felt once I took the hat off.
.-= Tara R.´s last blog ..Rules of the road and driving etiquette =-.
ha ha, not funny but I have done that too. Now my hair is all cut off so.
.-= Jacinta´s last blog ..happy 101 =-.
hahahahahhahahahahahahahhahahahaha.
Oh, yes, darlin. With you, not at you. XXOO
hate having headaches on a hot day – dare I put my hair back up???
.-= Fiona´s last blog ..A Trilingual Wedding =-.
hahahhaha that is awesome!
I’m so glad flat shoes are in at the mo. I’ve never been able to carry myself in a 5inch pair of heels even tho I love them and need them to look like a semi-grown up person.
.-= Gilz´s last blog ..Yet Another Update =-.
I’ve certainly had headaches exacerbated by too tight ponytails but I don’t think it’s ever been the cause…
lesson learned?
.-= Deidre´s last blog ..What I would say if I didn’t have an inner monologue. =-.
Ponyheadches are hell