June 2009

The calm before the storm

This morning, as I stepped out the door I noticed the air did not have the chill I had become accustomed to.  Rather, it was mild, not at all warm wrap and boot weather. As I drove into work the announcer declared that it was to be 20C today but don’t get too used to [...]

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Well, hello lover…

I have lusted after you for years. Dreaming of one day holding you in my hands, gently stroking my hand down your shaft. My whole body shudders at the thought of owning you, possessing you, waking up knowing that you are there waiting for me. Today I decided to take the plunge.  To give in [...]

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Fuck you postman. Or post woman. I mean really, how can you tell these days? No matter what you are offending someone.

This morning I was backing out of the driveway to take Boo to school.  We were discussing the virtues of building a rocket to get to America quicker than an aeroplane, cause I had a dream that I went to America to stay the night at Bossy’s house, but she had to take her dog [...]

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Oh come ON! It is funny! Dude will have to grow a thick skin if he wants to date my daughter… Oh and I have a question.

On Sunday morning Moo came to me and asked if The Boyfriend could come over.  She is sick with the Man Flu (cause dramatic princesses don’t get colds, they get Man Flu but WORSE!) and had taken the day off work to wallow in her own self pity. Apparently, The Boyfriend had an accident and [...]

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Kumbaya my Lord, kumbaya…

Last week we went on a ‘team building exercise’. The senior managers go on this shit all the time.  Sometimes it is to a flash hotel overlooking the city lights, others an island on the Whitsundays.  On one of these junkets they decided that in order to lift moral they should throw a few shekels [...]

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It is always ominous when you get a phone call from the school…

So I was sitting here, all innocent twittering about the ENORMOUS spider that greeted me in the hallway this morning that MPS disposed of by flushing it down the toilet and I am too scared to go to either loo cause what if the fucker is like that puppy in the UK that the kid [...]

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Letter to my eldest child

Dear Eldest Child, Household domestic duties I am writing to you today in reference to our conversation this morning, 16 June 2009, when you expressed your dismay at an article of clothing not being laundered.  I understand your dissatisfaction stemmed from your belief that your needs were not being met by a member of our [...]

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I had a post all done and then WordPress 2.7 ate it as punishment for not upgrading yet. Or maybe it knew I should be writing THIS post instead. Fucking omniscient bastard.

So I had this long post about this and that and a little bit of whatever and was trying to wangle some way of putting this into the post: stolen from here Cause it cracked me up, but WordPress 2.7, in its wisdom decided that when I hit ‘save draft’ I was in fact saying [...]

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So there was this one time when Moo’s boyfriend saw me half naked.

Last night was Moo’s school formal. Of course she looked gorgeous and beautiful and all the things you would expect of a child with my genes of awesome. Bizarrely, MPS was supplying the doof doof – as per Moo’s request, I believe her exact words were ‘Dad you are totally DJing the formal cause last [...]

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sign on a truck

Boo has a scratchy voice.  Which frustrates him no end because he has a penchant for replicating any high pitch sound he hears perfectly, and with a scratchy voice he just can’t quite get it right.  Which, hmmmm, frustrates is not the word… perhaps drives him fucking batshit crazy… So off to the doctors today.  [...]

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