Oh how will you ever forgive me.
It was a rash moment. She was there. I was there. There was time. The kids were otherwise occupied.
I couldn’t resist her.
I mean her skillz! She drew me in with promises of rapture and I was feeling a little low.
I needed a pick me up.
I needed some reassurance that I still had it.
And you were unavailable. So busy. So awesome. But everyone wants a piece of you and I was cast aside.
I don’t blame you. It is not your fault. The fault is mine.
I could have serviced myself. You taught me well. Showing me how and leaving me breathless at your amazing ability to give me exactly what I want, need, no matter how much I protest or say ‘do whatever, you decide, I trust you’.
And I do.
And then I strayed.
We talked about you during it you know. She whispered, ‘He will never know’
‘Are you sure?’
‘Trust me’
And I did.
And now my fucking fringe is crooked and too fucking short and Oh Sebastian the Wonder Hairdresser will you ever forgive me?
*sob*
{ 50 comments }
Oh sad!!!
Bwahahaha…I mean…sorry to hear that. You can just shave it off and start over, right?
Oh dear. The relationship can be rebuilt in time. For now, you need a hat.
Lie to Sebastian. Tell him that Boo attacked you in the night with scissors.
Everyone lies to their lover/hairstylist sometime.
What Anja said.
That’ll learn ya
HOW DARE YOU.
Can we get a pic?
The price you pay for flying too high to the sun!
LOL, the people who do the BlogHer blog featured posts thing must just LOVE you, Kelley.
I’d like to see a pic of this indiscretion.
Sinead O’Connor.
This is my fear. Especially since I found out my HairGoddess is PREGNANT. Shit. Now who is going to do my hair??
I need a freakin’ Wonder Hairdresser. Seeing as how Sebastian is going to LEAVE YOU now, why don’t you hook me up with his number?
Why is there only a small handful of hairdressers who know how to properly trim of fringe without looking like you have been attacked with a pair of shearers?
This is the first thing they should teach in hairdressing school – how to cut a fringe properly!
I am sure Sebastian will forgive you but you may have to bribe him with chocolate or cake.
Oh the shame woman! I have thought so many times of cheating on my girl…when she was unavailable…when I lived three hours away…when she raised her fee twenty-five bucks. But no, couldn’t do it and now I surely never will!
Every time I cheat on my hairdresser, I pay for it such evil ways. And since I have been traveling for 8 years, I never have good hair anymore. It is always a gamble going to get a hair cut.
Holy shit…I won’t tell you what I was thinking as I was reading through this….until. the. end.
Damn girl, I tell you, you need to be a writer..yes…a writer, of books, real books…you would earn a million on your awesomeness and I would be able to say…I KNEW HER WHEN…..
Hair grows….thankfully!
I never worry about my hair. I dye it myself. There’s even been a few times I cut it myself.
I know. I live dangerously.
It grows back, I promise. And there *are* wigs… think Brittany in a hot pink bob, no?
This is the one relationship I’ll never, ever mess with. Well, OK, the second. I’m not going to screw up the marriage, but for real, sometimes the marriage one comes after the one with the hair stylist.
Good luck, girlie.
I dyed my hair green once because my hair dude was busy.. Green. totally never doing that again.
Oh boy!! The ultimate betrayal…my hubby has seen some really funny sights and some really upset clients crawling back into his salon begging to have their hair fixed!!! Thank god it grows again, and sebastian is sure to forgive you just this once LOL
That’s what you get for being a hair slut. Worse than psychic sluts, really.
What? No pictures? Sebastian will forgive you. You may have to lick his boots though………
I used to always cut my own fringe. Straight across the top of my glasses frames. Now I’ve grown it out and it gets tied back in the pony tail with the rest of the hair.
Woah! You are in *so* much trouble now. Maybe a comb-over to disguise the fringe? LOL
Oh my goodness! Unfaithful to the hairdresser! I hope he forgives you.
Oh man, I hate it when that happens!
Harlot!
Aah. And this is why I love being a guy. Pop into any barber, ask for them to “make it shorter”, and I’m set
Nooooooo.
Why is it that a simple trim of a fringe can cause such problems for some professional hairdressers?
I too was once left looking like some sort of dominatrix with a *rudely* short fringe.
best. non. masturbatory. post. ever. (sorry about your bangs. hehe)
You know we need pictures. Truly. We NEED them.
You know, some of us dream about you being naughty, Kel
Amazing post.
I’m sure Sebastian will forgive you, he sounds like the Hair God, and Gods are meant to be forgiving!
Truly a tavesty. But I have done the same thing, but my bangs ended up half way up my head. NO matter how much I tried, I could NOT get them to cover my forehead AT ALL. Mortifying. NOthing worse than your hair looking like shit. BUt it will recover. And Sebastian? Tell him that it’s all his fault! Him and his busyness! How dare he!
Nothing is cuter than a bandana in times like these. And momma said there’d be days like these.
huahuahuahuahuahuahuahuahuahuya!!!
I have been there and I feel your pain…I have a hair goddess of my own andI have learned never to stray from her magical hands – it leads to disastrous results!
That is precisely why NOBODY touches my bangs. I’ll choke the bitch who cuts them too short, and I’d much rather the bitch be me.
Karma is a biatch.
(See how I used a Kelley-word there?)
Oi, that’s the worst, especially now you have to go and explain to him that you cheated on him!
I’m sure he’ll make your hair perfect again!
Oh the web you weave, my friend.
That was a great tale.
Sorry it ended in a wobbly fringe.
Hairdressers are like doctors. Once you find a good one, it’s a pain in the ass if you get a bad one.
At least my hairdresser knows I’m not pregnant when I complain of a migraine.
You did WHAT??? OMG!!! Thank goodness that shit grows back, I’d go running in all dramatic like and pretend it was a scene off of Jackass with some clippers or something, or like Anja said, blame it on the French Israeli – totally believable.
I can’t help but think of the poor chicas like me who are left without a hope in the world, all because Lickity Lovers 1&2 needed a little insurance money.If they weren’t in federal prison, I’d go and have a “serious” talk with them. At least when I showed up on the 6 o’clock news my hair would look fabulous! Right now I’m treading on thin ice at the verge of root rot and Pepe Le Pew the skunk…
That’s the worst. You decide to stray….. and get punished by the universe. Sucks.
That’s what you get for cheating on your hairdresser. This post reminds me of that Seinfeld episode.
Go to Sebastian and tell him Boo did it while you were sleeping. He’ll forgive that.
I’ve been going to the same stylist since I was 12…I am afraid to go anywhere else because the girl I go to gives a great cut. Don’t get me wrong, I’ve tried a couple others, and they were alright, but no one does me like Dana does…
Tell him you fell asleep with your child who happened to have gum.
Oh no. It was totally your fault LOL. Karma. Did your old hair dresser care? Hoping not.
You slut!
ah. jesus. this is funny. was not expecting that ending. well done.
Dude! This happened to me not too long ago. I begged for forgiveness and paid thru the nose with a mucho big tip to get back in my guy’s good graces.
Gotta beg!
OMG. I’m so sorry. I hope your fringe is better soon. I’m sure he’ll forgive you.
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