Cause I don’t want no damn puppy.
I am holding out for a unicorn.
Kevin? Kevin? Where is my purdy unicorn, fucker?
And in other news The Voices™ and I had another meeting (donut shop was closed) where we told each other how freaking awesome we are, me being the Grand PooBah of the Awesomeness, made a secret handshake and another graphic.
Apparently when people see crimes against humanity, AKA Crocs, they think of me. Biatches all over the world are reporting sightings of the evilness or cringing in terror as they strap their offspring in the footwear of the devil.
Socks AND Crocs? *shudder*
I mean WWJD people? He would wear sandals. Made of the hide of some farting animal that was destroying the planet. So save the world instead of polluting the brains of your poor children.
Cause Crocs totally cause brain damage. And poor choices in adult hood.
And make the wee little babies in Ethiopia starve.
And cause wrinkles, zits and haemorrhoid’s.
It is true.
And when there is a nuclear war, cockroaches and Crocs will be the only things to survive. Ergo, you are strapping the hope for the worlds future in cockroaches. It totally makes sense. All bar one of The Voices™ agree.
But we all decided she is crazy.
Just say no people.
And send me my damn unicorn.