Boo is ascared.
Hiding behind this elaborate camouflage is the object of his shit-your-pants-and-wipe-it-on-the-wall horror.
He constantly checks that it is properly covered.
Peeks inside the armoury to ensure it hasn’t moved.
And don’t even THINK of moving any of that crap, cause he will go bat-shit crazy and lose his mother fucking mind.
It is wrapped up here.
His eyes widen and pop out of his head at the thought of it escaping.
‘Mummy is it still there?’ he stage whispers from across the kitchen, from behind his hands covering his eyes and his stifled screams of abject terror.
What has got my son so rattled?
What could possibly illicit such a reaction from a normally oblivious child?
Fuck me dead. The kid is terrified of a sweet potato.
Seriously, what entertainment would I have in my life without this kid?
I am thinking of getting him one for his birthday.
Video taping the unwrapping.
And then sending it in to Funniest Home Videos.
Cause mummy needs a holiday.