Not to the extreme of little o’ Ms Jackson, but enough to flame my cheeks people.
Lets start at the start, where all good stories of humiliation and embarrassment, well, start.
Boo is on night whatever of Sleep is An Optional Extra. All night dance raves happenin’, complete with this:
Oh yes my lovelies, he likes to shake his booty with coloured lights. And that is the power point that he was working on last night. Teenage Mutant Ninja Teletubbies and burgers. A delightful combination.
It is also day elevently hundred of freaking ‘Hot Damn, howz this heat!’.
So I am sleep deprived with melting breasticles, and man am I pissed. Yeah, more than usual.
And distracted. Not my usual ‘oooh shiny!’ distracted, more ‘oh where was I going? And how the fuck did I end up in this town, I thought I was just going to the supermarket?’ kinda distracted.
So this morning started in the usual way, sheep dogging kids to bathroom/shower/pack bags/off the computer/dress/get outta my way I need the freaking mirror too biatch, and hauling their arses off to school.
MPS and girls dropped off at train station. Popped into the supermarket for a couple of things. Boo to school. Long chat with teacher, and aide, and a couple of mums and then off to work.
As I am walking through the work carpark I catch up with K.
‘Oooh! Purdy yellow shoes!’ I exclaim. Still smarting that I am stuck with a choice of 3 pairs of fucking flats.
‘Aren’t they cute!’ she squeals back. A total shoe whore. I am so responsible for that.
‘Um, Kel, you have different shoes on.’
‘I have had these for ages, don’t start giving me shit about my…..’
‘Kelley, look down’
Fuck me dead. I went to school, saw five billion people AND went to the supermarket and not one fucker said a thing.
Jumped in the car and raced home to change. One shoe.
The moral of the story is this children. Decide on what shoes you are wearing the night before, NOT in the middle of morning madness.
And, as promised, some more bling to fling.
Today’s installment of the fuck-Kelley-I-gave-you-that-bling-ages-ago bling fest are as follows:
First up is this from Stimey.
She said I was amazing and she loves me. Aww shucks.
Then this from Anja:
She is ruder than me. If that is at all possible.
This from Bettina:
um…. what? Apparently it says ‘Convulsive Compulsive Convolvulus Conviviality Bloggers’ but I am too tired and hot and freaking distracted to read it. I also got it originally from its birth mother Jayne at Our Great Southern Land.
That is enough for today. I still have MORE to fling, in honour of this stinking hot Tuesday afternoon (and not because I am lazy) I will award these to all of you. Take one, take them all, and take them with my thanks and appreciation for all your comments and emails that brighten my otherwise bad tempered, sarcastic, biatch on heels day.