but I did it anyway.
Today it is hot. Well not so much hot, but humid. Sweaty breasticles humid.
I hate humid. I hate hot. But you already knew that….
So I am in Boo’s room looking under his bed for his McDonalds Chicken McNugget box (the kid collects fast food containers….. yeah weird, but if you can’t eat it you may as well sniff the boxes. Same ingredients anyway…) and I was feeling really hot.
So I pulled my skirt up around my waist.
So there I am. Skirt around my waist. Butt in the air. Looking under the bed.
‘Hello?’ an unfamiliar MALE voice calls.
I thump my head on the base of the bed.
A father from school, dropping off some photos of Boo is standing at the OPEN FREAKING WINDOW!
‘Um, am I interrupting anything?’ He inquires, his eyes bugging out of his head, a flush in his cheeks.
I choose to pretend nothing happened.
‘No, just looking for something for Boo, come in!’
Fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck. At least I was wearing pretty panties today. And they weren’t lacy.
So he dropped off the photos and I saw him out.
As he wandered down the driveway, he turned and gave me a sly smile.
Yeah buddy, we both know what you saw. Lets never speak of it.
Unless you want to blog about it. That is fine. Just remember to mention how fabulous, tight and undimpled my arse is OK? And I will say that you are one hot Daddy…
{ 34 comments… read them below or add one }
oh no.. you poor thing..
ok, now THAT is funny!!
pissing meself laughing here…..
thankyou thankyou thankyou..
Oh and WTF was he doing looking through the windows???? is he related to Mr lurk behind the bushes freak?????
Don’t most normal people knock on the front door???
and what was it with the sly smile???
loser… (lucky about the good knickers tho..)
Brilliant! This is the kind of stuff that happens to me! Are you sure we’re not twins, separated at birth?
cheers
BC
PS And he makes out like he’s the normal one staring into your windows and all.
Too funny! I’m trying not to laugh because I’d be mortified if it happened to me but TOO FUNNY!
Wait! You don’t like the heat??????
Oh my God! Once? We were at the beach house, which only has one bathroom, and I was taking a shower, but my kid needed the potty. So she comes in, does her thing, then leaves, and leave the bathroom door open. The shower has a glass door. Then, a friend from town comes to see if we want to go to the beach that day… and my $%%^&* daughter lets him in. All the while, I am showering – hopefully not in the middle of washing anything too important – right while he is standing all of six feet away. For a few days I pretended to myself he wouldn’t have been able to see anything, what with the steam and all. Then, I happened to walk into the bathroom while my husband was showering… you can see every last pore.
I haven’t looked the neighbor in the eye since.
that so figures!! I’ll remember to keep my panty covered buns out of the air when a window is open from now on!
LMAO~
ROTFL
Where do you find these guys?
I mean doesn’t the man know what a frickin door is?
The next time I saw him if he gave me that sly smirk, I would say something really loud across the room like “Peer in anymore windows lately?”or ” I ever catch you looking in my daughters window I will bust your balls!got it?” and smile sweetly.
Man…
THAT’S what I’m talkin’ about!
Hahaha!
Oh, poor you! I would have been scarlet with embarassment and would have most likely thrown the bastard out immediately.
And, I TOTALLY agree with several folks above: what the hell was he doing coming to the window anyway!? Sounds fishy to me…
In spite of the heat – Merry Christmas! 🙂
Did he quick hide his camera phone? Can I have his address? I just want to talk to him, yea, that’s it.
Funny. Especially those photos he posted from his cell phone onto his myspace page…
At least you had nice panties on! ;^)
Oh my hell, you poor thing! I would have died about 6 thousand deaths. Note to self: get new panties. ; )
OMG I just died laughing!
Good thing it wasn’t granny panties, or a g-string.
Oh, dude, that’s rough. I’m impressed by your grace under pressure. I think I would have crawled under the bed and stayed there.
One more reason for you to hate the heat, huh?
Thank the lord I rarely wear skirts, cause my ass ain’t the kind anyone wants to be seeing!
I’d be anxious every time I saw him.
LOL, too funny.
Lucky you have a bum that can wear lacey undies! Me? I’m a nanna undies kinda girl these days and the breasticles? They’d be tucked in them too! Sorry for the overshare 🙂
I bet that guy thought all his Christmases had come at once!
Did he not think about knocking on the front door first before peering through all your windows to see if you were home?
What a weirdo!
Nicole: Seems to be a running theme with me….
slouching mom: Yeah, laugh at my expense…. oh right, that was the point in posting wasn’t it.
Kim: You’re so very welcome. And we have a long house. you walk past Boo’s room to get to the front door. So not being freaky, just unfortunate timing!
babychaos: perhaps we are. I only write down half the embarrassing stuff I do.
Stella: Your day will come, I look forward to reading all about it.
Missy: :p
Madmad: He he he…. you win.
FXSmom: I am just doing a community service here.
Sorrow: It was all innocent. See my comment to Kim.
Fab: Yeah I figured… if any photos emerge would you like a signed copy?
Sensitiva: Merry Christmas to you too!
Hotfessional: You know I luvs ya. You want a photo of my arse, you just have to ask!
VE: First my mother, now the guy from school….. are you sure you are not the freaky guy in the bushes across the road?
Beth: phew!
laughingatchaos: Just don’t get crotchless..
Veronica: I didn’t think of that. Yeah, thank GOD it wasn’t a G!
Stimey: yeah babe, it is the heats fault!
Ange: I am thinking of winking and shaking my touche for him actually…
tiggymooshoo: My arse is not what it used to be. Some might say I shouldn’t be wearing lacey undies…..
Riayn: Nah, not totally his fault. See my comment to Kim.
Glad you are taking this in good humor – you had me giggling at the picture you painted.
Will you keep us informed of his reactions when he sees you in the future 🙂
LMAO, so was he a hot dad? Do tell.
Merry Christmas Strange dad… and a happy hooha, I mean new year. Giggle.
That was fantastic! Too funny! Guess he thinks he got his Christmas present early! In my experience, men seem to think all butt’s look great. So I’m sure yours looked fabulous, tight and undimpled to him! I hate heat too … I’ll remember to keep my skirt a little lower though 🙂
Sueblimey: Seeing I won’t see him till the end of January, I hope all will be forgotten that I mooned him.
Mystarbucks: That depends if he has a blog. And blogged about it doesn’t it? Lets say, if he does have a blog YES, he is so hot…. *snort*
phatsheep: *gaffaw*
Simone: Yeah you are right. It is us women that are judgemental. Guys see skin and that is good enough for them, LOL.
Hey -at least he smiled at you after. If it was me, they’d have run off at first sight!
OMG I think I would have died.
Either that or just lifted up my shirt so he could just get the whole thing over with in one go.
Ook. I can top it, though. I once inadvertently mooned the Poet Laureate and an entire conference of writers. Hot pink lace.
Karen: You never know till you try it…. 🙂
Gina: Damn. Shoulda thought of that!
Raincoaster: I pass the trophy on…
oh your blog is the best thing for ages – thanks for a the giggles….
ROFLMAO!!!!
I’m so behind on blog posts….glad I didn’t miss that one!
K
Panties on! When did you start wearing panties? Only joking! So did you ask him to take you for coffee seen as how he now knows you didn’t have any breakfast………